How to look like a biker.

To ride a Harley, you need the look.

No. Shut up. To ride a Harley, you need a Harley. That’s it, everything else is optional, well except the helmet because it’s the law. So what’s all this about? The biker look.

sterotype

The Stereotype according to Google (Note. This guy also looks like your uncle. Weird)

I’ve been riding for a little over a year. It’s been fun and I haven’t died. Yay!? But I’ve also been told I don’t dress like a biker. Wrong. I’ve never been one to follow a trend, but to make them! OK you’ve caught me, I’m not a trend setter. Well sometimes the trends come back for a while and I’m cool again (Remember the nerdy look? You’re Welcome)… Anyways. In this article we’ll be analyzing the biker stereo-types as found on this WikiHow.

http://www.wikihow.com/Look-Like-a-Biker

“Old Leather Jacket”
Let’s begin with the “Bikers wear leather jackets”  Yeah leather jackets are cool, I can’t argue that. Even if you don’t plan to get a biker look, you should always have at least one, they are so practical.

“Leather boots.”
Ugh I personally don’t like boots when riding. I prefer biker sneakers. Check these out.
bilt_dexter_textile_motorcycle_shoes
You might like boots, but they can get uncomfortable if you wear them all day, and sometimes they’re not even safer than a pair of converse. (If you get the wrong boots) These look good but don’t protect where it matters.

“DooRag?”
Headsock. I prefer headsocks cause they also keep my neck warm and stop all the little rocks and pebbles from hitting my neck and pecking at my wind pipe. You can also make it into quick neck gaiter when off the bike. The typical paisley bandanna is so overused that it just screams tacky, but if you can pull it off discretely, why not? But the DooRag is fine, not mandatory.

“Demin.”
I’m a 90’s kid. I love denim. you can’t go wrong with denim, except….. when you’re in an accident. Denim is not as tough as leather and won’t protect as well. But putting holes and making your jeans distressed on purpose, come on…. that’s like a #1 sign you’re not a biker. We like to keep the skin on our bones, not on the pavement. If we can see your knees, goodbye kneecaps. Poser. I rarely see bikers with hole in their jeans, this one’s just dumb.

“Chain wallet”
Actual quote from the website. “There is nothing a biker fears more than having his wallet fall out while riding.”
Haha, no. It’s stupid cars. We hate getting run over by cars driven by distracted and cellphone using drivers. That’s my biggest fear, well that and getting run over by a semi. If you’re wearing a proper pair of jeans or riding pants, your wallet will not fall out. Wearing skinny jeans on the other hand, will. This is not however, your typical biker wear.

“Get a tattoo”
No, why? When you’re covered from head to toe in proper riding gear no one notices that dorky Metallica tattoo. Sometimes they don’t even know the color of your skin! Just watch, no one’s racist when you’re on a bike, because they don’t see you, they see the motorcycle. And everyone will equally hate you when you cut in between them at 60mph. Off the bike, maybe you wanna “look” tough, well a tattoo can’t fix that, sorry buddy, you’re still a wimp.

“Bikers need to have tough hair to match their tough persona.”
Stop this. Tough persona? That’s a quick way to spot a poser. Some of the nicest people you meet ride motorcycles. In regards to hair…. that’s really anything you want. Most people keep it short and practical, log works as long as it’s not flowing all over the place smacking you when you ride. Beards are optional though. I imagine they’d be good for keeping that neck warm. But a scarf does the job well. However I don’t recommend using hair gel when wearing a helmet, it flakes, so keep the hair product to a minimum

“Consider purchasing a motorcycle”
Well duh. This should be step 1. If you wanna look like a biker, ride a motorcycle. Please seriously consider buying one. It’s fun!

“Get a biker physique”
To be honest, this is actually a helpful tip for everyone. Long distance riding requires strength and stamina. It’s really tiring riding a motorcycle and you won’t last long if you’re a weak chub chub or thin skin mint. Shape up because it’s 500 pound on two wheels, and it doesn’t come with training wheels, baby.

“Frequent biker establishments.”
Motorcycles are lined up outside the old Mill Biker Bar establishment, Harley’s, Indians, and Triumphs, gleam in the sunlight outside the bar.
Inside the fan slowly spins as the heavy metal music plays in the background.
Tough biker guys are inside drinking beer and being rowdy.
Then, a lone ranger, the leather chapped, boot strapping, helmet carrying young man walks in and everyone notices him. The cool biker dude.

This never happens by the way. No one will notice and if you’re among friends they don’t mind.

But that’s up to you, when you ride often it’s pretty normal to get into biker meet ups, bars, midnight rides and Sunday trips to Daffodil Hill with the guys, (for reals that’s a thing). This just happens naturally when you make biker friends. Ask questions about their rides, any adventures, be a kind person, that’ll help get into the biker look. But if you’re a poser, you can’t fake it. If someone asks why you dress like a biker without a motorcycle, just admit that you don’t ride yet and you’re just wearing leather and denim because you felt like it.

Plus, bikers come in all looks and you wear what you like. I dress for safety, sure it makes me look fat. Yeah but I like black, flannel and denim. Does this make me a stereotypical biker? no, sometimes i wear a suit cause I have to go to a meeting. Is it safe? absolutely not. So what makes a biker? The bike.

If you’re worried about how you look rather than safety or comfort, then someone’s trying to sell you something. I’m not telling you you can’t do that or real bikers don’t ignore safety. But looks account for very little of the biker mentality.

Real bikers don’t care.
rainsuit
Teletubby jumpsuits, black leather, retro-reflective vests that can be seen from space, mens bathing suits…. (ok that lst one might get you pulled over for other reasons, you get my point). A biker wears anything he or she wants. Not everyone has to look like they just came out of a “Sons of Anarchy” episode. And even the bikers that dress like that, just do it cause they like it and don’t really tell you you should dress like they do. It’s no one’s business to say what your style is.

Kind of puts things in perspective, huh?

But pay attention to the last part of this video.

So yeah, it’s fine to dress like a wannabe cool biker, we get it, you wanna be cool, but being cool is all relative and any true biker would say do what you wanna do. There is no true biker look, it’s all about riding. So if you don’t ride a motorcycle yet and start hanging out with those who do, eventually you might get the courage to actually ride. so yeah dress up, make friends, have fun and be safe.

IIIP MonoPrice Mechanical Keyboard (best bang for your buck?)

Oh I remember when I typed on a regular keyboard, it was so normal, so ordinary, I totally ignored it. So why are we bringing it up? Because they don’t make them like they used to. Or do they? When you’d buy a brand new desktop from Fry’s or Best Buy and the generic keyboard that came with it looked something like this. You didn’t mind.
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Let’s take a ride.

As some of you may already know, I have taken up motorcycle hobbies such as minibikes, dirt bikes and street cruising. Why because fun that’s why. It’s also something I’ve always secretly wanted to do, but never had the money for nor the ambition, let alone a need. Until now. After working a stable 8-5 job for years, driving a boring electric car after working on cool/fun auto-mechanic stuff and giving up on the old Dodge Dart, I thought it was time for a change.

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Natural scrolling and reverse scrolling. A complaint.

 

From the beginning of time, or at least since computers have been created, the mouse was a tool that came into this realm with the intent to make things easier, and eventually we upgraded to touch screen and it was bliss.

However, in the transition, we’ve developed touchscreen habits that have us moving pages of content up and down. Do we swipe the page down like a natural page? Do we scroll it like a mouse? Or should we touch on a scroll bar and pull the bar down like the blinds of a window? (That was a bad idea, please see Windows CE) It’s a user interface design nightmare! What would the user naturally do?!!!

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How To Be Lazy At Intel. 2016 Edition.

After 5 years of working at Intel. I’ve made an anniversary bog post about slacking off at work! It’s only fitting since I’m in a new lab and things have changed a bit. Here we go!

  • Come in exactly at 9:00. try to time it just right.
  • If in the event you come in “too” early, get some coffee, browse the web and answer an email to let people know you’re a hardworking individual who comes in early to get the job done, but in reality you’re just faking it and on FaceBook. But hey at least you look good on paper.
  • At the morning meeting, make it seem like you’re taking notes. Even though you’re just writing blog posts about slacking off and doodling. Nod in agreement plus say something witty and funny so people know how clever you are.
  • Get yourself some tea (it makes you seem more sophisticated) this time with your coworkers right after the meeting. No one is actually working this early in the morning and it’s free anyways.
  • Go to another team meeting, when asked what you’re working on, just say you’re real busy with (Insert current hot topic of the week) and say they no one can help because only you know how to handle this.
  • Don’t bother with following all the rules of the workplace, they get in the way, if you need to stand on that desk to reach something, you do it. Because you’re smart and efficient worker and won’t get hurt at all.
  • During work hours look busy typing up more stuff in Notepad++ in light text against a black background, it looks like you’re programming, but you’re really just working on your blog.
  • You’re low on Tea, get some fresh fruit and water, it’s free so might as well, bring along the gang for one last round before…..
  • Lunch Time!
  • Take lunch five minutes early, you need that time to get ready and be in your car by 12:00.
  • It’s OK to come back 5 or even 7 minutes late after your one hour lunch. Sometimes it’s not enough for that fancy Thai restaurant. You need to enjoy your food, not scarf it down in a rush.
  • This is the hard part of the day, you actually have to do some work. tough it out. I believe in you.
  • Break time!
  • Take a nice long 30 minute break. Yes you get a full 30 minutes and if you started even just 3 minutes late. You MUST extend it by three minutes at least. And all the while, let people know you left for break late because you’re such a hard worker.
  • Finish up whatever task you where doing, it’s OK to only finish only one thing today. That’s progress and it counts for something.
  • Near the end of the shift, talk with your coworkers, it’s OK to slack off while the other teams are busy and scrambling to get stuff done. It’s not your problem they can’t finish their work on time. You’re so good at this, you don’t even have to try as hard as they do. But they got this, you don’t need to help, just get back to FaceBook and giggle at those funny pictures.
  • One last drink for the day, enjoy that free tea. oh yeah.
  • Overtime? No way! So what if the engineers are overloaded with work? You’re only on the job from 9 to 6 so anything outside of that is not your problem.
  • Enjoy working at Intel! It’s not like they could give you a career here.

Disclaimer, This article does not represent the writer’s opinion. It is for entertainment purposes.

HHKB LITE 2 (Insane in the Membrane)

This is going to be a test of the emergency escape system. The first thing I noticed on the happy hacking keyboard was that the backspace key, which I sadly seem to rely upon a lot in life, (Like most things) is right where the `~ key is and it makes for a lot of mistakes, its not something I’d like to get used to. But the regular keys typing is really something of a natural feel though the mushy rubber dome keys are not to my liking.

hhkb_lite_2

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What happened to the ScreenSaver?

Oh the joy of navigating a Starfield, the adventuring through a maze with the rat, flipping rock and it’s dead ends, only to find a trophy and begin all over again. What happened to all the cool ScreenSavers?

 

I remember my Elementary school and the computer lab had these amazing distracting images of scenes that would flicker ALL day long until school was over and the teacher shut them down for the night, only to start them up again the next school day.

What has changed? Technology that’s what changed. Let’s start with the reason screensavers existed before.

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Today’s Modern Polaroid Snap

Before you read this, it’s not a review on the Polaroid Snap Camera. It’s a review of what it stands for. Can this thing replace what Polaroids once stood for? Let’s begin.

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Polaroid Black and White Adventures

Part 2

Black and while film. The classic medium of hipsters and cheapskates who don’t want to pay extra for colored film. In this next installment of cheapskate hipster instant photographer we try out some more expired Impossible film on the notoriously hard to shoot quirky Polaroid Land Pop-up. AKA Sonar Onestep SX70 whatever.

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Polaroid Land Camera SX-70 Onestep Sonar

(Wait, this isn’t a hipster blog! This is a tech blog, why are we reading, this? Because this is technology-ish related and you’re already here so just bear with me)

Part 1 of 3

let me say it one more time Polaroid Land Camera SX-70 Onestep Sonar. That’s quite a name, but thankfully we can break that down a bit, but I won’t, because this is one of the most popular types of instant film camera’s out there, I think you know what this is, in fact it’s so far into the culture of America that we all know the Instagram Logo, the instant film and the essence of hipster cred this thing gets you. It’s a cool retro picture taker. And I’m going to catalog my experience with it.

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